- May 2015

Tech Tuesday: Self Parking cars

Tech Tuesday: Self Parking Cars

I have a gripe with gourmet burgers and the hype behind them. The amount of times my friends have told me about “The most amazing burger I will have” has made me loathe the very notion of even trying out a new gourmet burger. See I am a foodie, so if you tell me that something will be the most amazing thing I have experienced, it makes me rather excited. When it’s not as good as you make it out to be, it feels like that one time you were promised a clown at your party but then it turned out to be your uncle. Why make as if Ronald Mcdonald himself will be the source of entertainment if I can clearly see that this is uncle Mordecai with a suit on? It’s so annoying. Then he has the audacity to say “what’s your name little boy?” Its Francisco! Remember? you took me to go watch Spiderman with your kids last week, you’re not fooling anyone, I know who you are. You see this annoyance? This is how I feel about self parking cars. These systems which use extra park distance control sensors basically tell you when to brake and accelerate whilst the car turns the wheel for you during a parking manoeuvre. The result? Nine times out of ten you look like a new driver that just passed their test because your instructor felt sorry for you because you wouldn’t stop crying. So in short, their useless.

To add insult to the injury these systems which barely work cost an extra fortune on new car and they encourage laziness too. I have driven three different vehicles with these systems and each time, they have disappointed me. Perhaps my uncle Mordecai is the chief designer, you never know with him. Check out a video of exactly what I am talking about and tell me if I am crazy.

PS: Surprisingly, there has been one gourmet burger that was in fact brilliant, maybe car makers will surprise me and develop a self parking system that works too.